3:09 PM

Teaser Tuesday

I figured if I'm going to get people interested in my WIP, I should post an occasional excerpt. That way you can 1) see my writing style 2) see if the story interests you 3) question me about things you may not understand 4) point out an error (be it plot related, grammatical, etc).  I will warn you that I have not done any serious editing yet so there are bound to be some errors. Please feel free to point them out kindly...or ya know, not so kindly if you're a bitch/bastard like that. I won't mind. Really.

So without further ado, I present you with an excerpt from the tentatively titled Red Dust (to note, this comes from very early on in the story):

    “Natalie Abigail Armstrong. Where the hell have you been?” came the angry voice of her brother Xavier. Natalie, who had been in the process of climbing the paddock fence to get back into the yard, stopped and looked in the direction of the angry voice.

    “Shit,” she muttered under her breath. It must be later than she thought. She sighed again and threw her leg over the fence landing lightly on the other side.
    “I’m waiting,” barked Xavier.

    “I was up on the hill,” she mumbled, “Sorry. I guess I lost track of time.”

    “That excuse is getting old,” her brother replied, “When are you going to finally get accustom to the time here?”

    “Well excuse me for not assimilating as easily as you!” Natalie replied hotly and stormed past her brother. She got to the front door where her other brother, Collin, was standing watching the exchange. Collin gave her a small smile and stepped aside so she could enter the house. She stomped through the small house and slammed the door to the washroom. Xavier sighed as he followed her past Collin and into the house.

    “She’s still having a hard time Xavier,” Collin commented to his brother while putting a bowl of salad on the table, “Her eyes were all red.”

    “I understand that,” Xavier replied, “but she can’t keep living in the past. This is our life now. She has to get used to Terra Nuevo and move forward.” Collin nodded in agreement.

    “I know, but cut her some slack. She’s a girl, a teenage girl at that, without a mother figure. Couple that with all that’s happened in the past two years and you’ve got to admit she’s come through better than most would,” stated Collin. Xavier hung his head and closed his eyes. He knew his brother was right. His sister was stronger than most girls her age and he knew he shouldn’t be so hard on her, but he didn’t know how else to deal with her. If only the others were here, they might better know what to do.


MBee said...

Yes I'm commenting on my own post. I seem to always have an issue when it comes to passed and past. I think I have used it correctly in the excerpt above, but if not, someone please correct me! Thanks!

Gary said...

Your comments system doesn't like me Bee....

MBee said...

It does now it seems ;) I did review some of the stuff we discussed earlier and I'll be making corrections when I do edit. The stuff written early on was during Nano when I was in a rush to get the words down so there is a lot of editing to be done.